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December 01, 2005

Really gross facts

WARNING: Red alert on the Pillage Idiot Advisory System. If you are offended by extremely immature subject matter, you shouldn't be reading this blog, and it's time to avert your eyes now!

Thanks to Jonah Goldberg at the Corner, who should be but unfortunately isn't a Pillage Idiot reader, I've learned something extremely gross. Well, technically, many things that are extremely gross.

The British tabloid Sun has an article with the delightful headline "Girls fart more than guys." I'm sorry to use the (other) F-word, but that's what it says. Personally, I doubt this "fact" based on some experience. And I asked my 14-year-old son whether he thought it was true -- who better situated to opine on flatulence than a teenaged boy? His mumbled conclusion: "I don't know."

The article makes other assertions of fact, of really gross fact, like these:

Your sponge contains more bacteria than your toilet.

50 per cent of women and more than 90 per cent of men don’t wash their hands after they’ve been to the loo – unless someone else is watching them.

The biggest tapeworm ever found inside the human body was 35 metres long.
And these:
Over your lifetime you will produce enough spit to fill a swimming pool.

When Eskimo babies have colds, their mothers suck the snot out of their noses.
Again, sorry for using the (other) S-word, which I've used only once before.

Finally, I must report that Glenn Reynolds has mentioned a toy he'd like to have: a potato gun. If you check the link to Amazon, it says that others who bought the gun also bought something called a "Fart Pen." Go figure. So I wonder what Reynolds thinks about male versus female flatulence. A small prize to the first reader who obtains a serious answer from him.