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December 04, 2005

Dave Barry's holiday gift guide

It's time for the annual Dave Barry holiday gift guide.

I particularly recommend:

  • "Poop-Freeze" to harden your dogs deposits so you can pick them up more easily and a doggie backpack to carry the stuff in on the way home. As Dave Barry says, why shouldn't the dog have to carry it?
  • An electric marshmallow toaster that let you toast three marshmallows at a time, using battery power to rotate them.
  • A scrolling LED belt buckle that provides scrolling text messages that can promote you in any way you choose. You can even increase your income by accepting advertising.
  • And for those who are a little edgy, uh, how to say this, well, let's just use the manufacturer's terminology: "nipple enhancers."