The progress of science and useful arts

If your nostrils are not free and clear, you basically have two choices. The first is what we might call the low-tech method: tissue for the (sort-of) liquid stuff and manual removal for the solid stuff. The second choice, through the indispensable InventorSpot, is more high-tech: a mucus-removing gun. (This invention fully warrants the "Dude" headline given to it at HotAir.)

Not to be outdone, HotAir commenter and occasional Pillage Idiot commenter "veeshir" offers this patent application: a "Toy gas fired missile and launcher assembly." You might not realize unless you click the link, or unless I tell you, that the gas it fires is man-made, if you catch my drift. "To operate the assembly, the operator places the inlet tube with its valve open adjacent his anal region from which a colonic gas is discharged." Dude.