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November 09, 2005

Serbs, but not the Huns

Yeowww!!

According to this article, mentioned by Jonah Goldberg at the Corner, Serbs are "lining up to have electric shocks delivered to their testicles as part of a new contraceptive treatment."

The "fertility expert" quoted in the article, Dr. Sava Bojovic, says that "the small electric shock makes men temporarily infertile by stunning their sperm into a state of immobility."

He said: "We attach electrodes to either side of the testicles and send low electricity currents flowing through them.

"This stuns the sperm, effectively putting them to sleep for up to 10 days, which means couples can have sex without fear of getting pregnant.

"The method does not kill the sperm permanently and it does not affect the patient's health."

Dr Bojovic added patients were now lining up at his fertility clinic in Novi Banovci for the shock treatment, as it had none of the problems attached to using condoms, the male pill or having a vasectomy.
This doesn't make much sense to me. What happens when the stunned sperm wake up in a strange bed (so to speak)? Do they say to themselves, and each other, I guess we're not supposed to go about our business? Doesn't this sound like a Woody Allen movie -- a cross between Sleeper and Everything You Always Wanted to Know about Sex?

I figure this must be a sick joke by that infamous Serbian tyrant Slobodan Milosevic, because the final sentence of the article is really too much to believe:
[Dr. Bojovic] added: "We are hoping to have a small battery powered version on sale in the shops in time for Xmas."
Can you imagine how great this would be for women in bad marriages? "OK, dear, no headache tonight, but first you have to give yourself electric shocks in your testicles, and you know how I like it slow." If this thing had been available in the U.S., John Bobbitt would have been in pain but intact.