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October 30, 2006

A story too good to check

This is from the annals of "stories too good to check" (see here for an explanation).

Imagine you're a Palestinian terrorist taking a shower and the Israelis arrive to arrest you. Now what do you do? Well, if you're the kind of Palestinian terrorist who's willing to speak to a reporter for WorldNetDaily (on condition on anonymity), then here's what you'd do:

JERUSALEM – A wanted Palestinian terrorist showering at his parents home last week escaped an Israeli arrest raid by jumping out a window and running naked through a densely populated refugee camp.
But that's not all, and here's one reason "the event is now well-known in his city."
"I entered to take a shower and suddenly while I was soaping myself I heard voices and people shouting. I didn't know what they were shouting but I heard the word 'jiash' (soldiers) and I understand that the Israeli army was attacking our house."

* * * * *

Continued the Brigades leader: "I went out of the bathroom and from the second floor I jumped to the roof of our neighbors. From this roof to another one and than to the street. Soldiers were already far from me at my parents house. I started running almost 200 meters (about 650 feet) in the camp street naked trying with acrobatic gestures to hide my buttocks and my sexual organ.

"If I saw somebody in front of me so I put one or two hands on my sexual organ; if there was nobody in front of me and I heard people speaking or laughing behind me I put my hands on my buttocks," related the terror leader.
Here are my questions for any of my readers who are scholars in Islamic law: What is the punishment for a guy who "put one or two hands on my sexual organ" -- in public? What is the punishment for a guy who "put my hands on my buttocks" -- in public? Something has to be lopped off, I would venture.

But as with all stories that are too good to check, this story has a lesson for the protagonist. Next time, he said, it will all be different.
He said he did not have his gun in the bathroom while taking a shower, but that he would never make that "mistake" again.

"Also next time I will be more careful and I will have my shower when I am wearing my clothes," he said.
Chalk this up as just another Israeli atrocity.

UPDATE: The Al-Aqsa Penis Brigade??