Not dead yet

Suppose you're speaking on the phone to someone who insists you're dead. Suppose that person is a federal government official.

Any advice on how to handle it?

No, it didn't happen to me. But here's a tidbit:

MADISON COUNTY, Ga. -- Twenty-two-year-old Lisa Kohlhagen of Colbert, Ga. in Madison County went through Army basic training but was discharged after a knee injury.

She said when her disability checks stopped coming, the Department of Veteran’s Affairs told her it was because she was dead.

And here's the best part:

“And I called them because it wasn’t there and they said, ‘You’re dead,’ and I said, ‘No, I’m not dead.’ And they kept trying to tell me I was dead but I’m not,” said Kohlhagen.

I keep thinking the conversation was going to be more like this: "I'm not dead." "Yes, you are." "I want a second opinion." "OK, you're ugly, too."

Or at least, "If I'm dead, that means I don't have to pay income tax any more, right?"

How would you have handled it?

(via Fark)