-- Joe Biden
Principal: Joey, Mrs. Ballenchain tells me you've been saying bad words in her classroom.
Biden: No, Mr. Whacker, it's all a misunderstanding.
Principal: Really, Joey? Pray tell.
Biden: Well, Mr. Whacker, when she turned off the lights to show a movie, I said, "It's as dark as a ship's hold in here."
Principal: Be honest, Joey. You didn't say "ship's hold," did you?
Biden: Well . . . uh . . . I . . . er . . . I guess not.
Principal: Because Mrs. Ballenchain says you used a four-letter word.
Biden: Gosh, no, Mr. Whacker. It was actually only three letters.
Principal: Three letters?
Biden: Yeah . . . S - H - I - T. Three letters.
Biden video here.