A lot of my readers have been complaining that I haven't been keeping them up to date on the latest news in mutilated male members.
Let me just say, "I hear you."
From Thailand, there's an AFP video report (via Ace) that I find very troubling. A British Thai(?)-accented woman, reporting from Thailand, says this: "Penis slashing by Thai women is so common that Thai surgeons have become world-renowned specialists when it comes to penis reattachments."
You really should check out the video, which, I'm sorry to report, doesn't always load. [Try using Firefox.] A Thai surgeon is interviewed, and although his English is hard to understand, Breitbart.tv quotes him thus: "Sometimes they chop into pieces. In those cases we cannot put it back."
You'll be relieved to know, however, that the surgeon says there'll still hope: "But we build a new one for the patient." He says that the best chance of success is when the detachment occurred within 6 hours. The member is complete, "but we cannot guarantee function."
The female reporter maintains, throughout, her neutral reporter's voice, but you can just tell she's enjoying it: "In this male dominated society, women have few options to assert their rights." She interviews a psychiatrist psychotherapist who says that jilted lovers might kill, "but to kill is not enough for Thai women."
[Also: I forgot to mention that at the end of the video is a scene of a market, in which a woman hesitantly reaches for a bunch of bananas. As George Carlin would say, You don't have to be Fellini to figure that out.]
Not totally related, but close enough: Rebecca Gomez, on Fox Business, interviews a plastic surgeon, Gary Alter, who apparently has a TV show called Dr. 90210. (Alter, by the way, is a classic name for a plastic surgeon.) She asks him what the craziest procedure he's had on his show is. The transcript, courtesy of Portfolio.com's Mixed Media (via HotAir):
REBECCA GOMEZ: What is the craziest procedure that you've had on your show so far?Dr. Alter, of course, was the only guy who knew how to handle this. (Although he doesn't say how the man was able to urinate, which strikes me as a major life activity.)
DR. GARY ALTER: Well, on the show, probably it's a man who had a buried -- or hidden -- penis.
GOMEZ: Where was it hiding?
ALTER: Well, it was hiding in his pubic fat...
GOMEZ: Come on!
ALTER: And in his scrotal sack. And he was 49 years old -- never had intercourse.
GOMEZ: No way!
Gomez and Alter go on to discuss labiaplasty, and Gomez says that if you want to get plastic surgery, you have to "do your homework." She adds: "I mean, it's like stock picking. You gotta do your homework."
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