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April 12, 2005

Moose-achusetts

"Why did the moose cross the road?" is a far less significant question in Massachusetts these days than "How do we prevent the moose from landing in your passenger seat?" This scary article (courtesy of Fark.com) examines the problem.

In a typical collision, the car hits the animal's legs, causing the moose to crash down through the windshield, crushing the roof, and landing in the passenger compartment.
So the authorities are trying to use high tech to solve this low-tech problem.
But now some traffic engineers around the country are experimenting with redesigning roads to accommodate wandering wildlife and using high tech laser and infrared devices, developed for space exploration and anti-missile systems, to warn motorists when a moose wanders into the road.

"We're investigating ways to manipulate the drivers and also ways to manipulate the animals," said John Perry, a biologist with the Maine Department of Transportation. "And when moose are involved, it might be easier to manipulate the driver."
You women who have never quite understood the human male should read about male animals to gain insight.
Most collisions happen in the spring, when yearling moose head out on their own, or during the fall mating season. A bull moose in pursuit of his lady love is not going to pause to let a minivan pass.
So don't get in the way of a guy who's overcome by lust. Unless you want him in your passenger seat with his legs sticking through a broken windshield.